Damiano Family

Happy Birthday Mom!

2011-10-31T09:39:00.000-07:00

Today would have been my mother's Birthday.

This is the eulogy I gave at her funeral.

I love you Mom.

“A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet”. Shakespeare wrote this long before October 31, 193* when my mother was born in IA. She was named Bernell by her Mother, D. L., after a girl friend in Denmark. Her father J. T. was working as a farm laborer, and her crib was an orange crate with a pillow for a mattress. I think she always seemed to internalize the humility of that orange crate, but to me it is lovely to think of the sweet smell of orange blossoms enveloping a newborn on a soft feather pillow. My mother hated her name. I must admit I was relieved when she emphatically assured me she did NOT want me to give it to any of my children. Whether you knew her as Bernell T., Bernell S., Babs C., Lorraine C., Babs S., or Mom, the words of Shakespeare ring true. My mother was as lovely as a rose and smelled just as sweet. She continually blossomed among the thorns of life, while sharing her beauty with those who knew her. She appreciated the variety of people she met, the places they came from, and the beauty they added to the garden. She had difficulty choosing a favorite flower, because she saw the beauty each brought in its season and habitat.

Mom grew up in Council Bluffs IA after her parents divorced when she was 6. That was always hard on her, especially being separated from her brother Larry, and sister Evelyn. Life with a stepmother was difficult, and she often wondered why her mother did not want her. She always loved having her brother Roy and the younger brothers and sisters that came from her Dad’s marriage to Margaret. It was a large family with seven step-siblings. She didn’t have a lot of material things, and started to work early. I remember mom scaring my kids by telling them about her first job at age 10. She got 5 cents an item for ironing laundry for the neighbors. She was always hated to go because she had to go down into their dark cellar basement where there were spider webs. In high school, she got to work at the Strand Movie Theatre which she always spoke of fondly. She got to be a “soda jerk” and an usher and wear a spiffy uniform, which she said was probably the nicest set of clothes she had. I think it must have been there that Mom decided she liked to have a sharp outfit. She always said how much she loved being a teenager in the 50’s with all of the fun music, fashions, and cars of the day.

It was preparing for her high school graduation that she learned encountered the first variation of her first name. Her whole life her father had told her her name was spelled “BURNEILLE”, but when she obtained a copy of her birth certificate to present for her diploma, the spelling was “BERNELL”. Imagine her surprise to learn she had been spelling it wrong her whole life. To add insult to injury, the school got it wrong on her diploma and wrote “DERNELL”.

Upon graduation she was anxious expand her horizons and tore out of Iowa as fast as she could. She headed to Salt Lake City to work as a telephone operator, which she thought was a great adventure, and was earning money to meet Dick in Hawaii so they could marry. They were married in the Hawaii temple in October, 195*. Mom loved everything but the bugs in Hawaii and gained an appreciation for a good party when she participated in the festivities of Hawaii becoming a state. She had Rick in 195*, Doug in 196*, and Jodi in 196*. They were living in Salt Lake City when she and Dick divorced. It was at this time she decided she wanted a fresh start and started going by “Babs”. She had heard this name on a TV show, and thought it was cute, and it stuck. She was terrified to be a young single mother, and was very optimistic when she married my dad, Boyd C. in 196*. From there they moved around Utah and California some before coming to Sacramento, California where they had Bradley. Things were tight with finances and mom was always trying to make bread and cookies to sell for extra money when she could.

It was in 197* they moved north to Paradise, and that was where she spent some of the happiest years of her life. I was born there in 197*. She loved the pine trees, the temperate weather, and the sociality of church members. She made many lifelong friends there, and it was there that she enjoyed a period relative comfort. In 197* she and my dad built her dream house on Valley View Dr. and it was there that she thrived. The December after they moved in their home was featured in the local Parade of Homes and she worked tirelessly to make her home “magazine perfect”. She had a talent for making things beautiful and loved attending to the smallest detail to make it just right. What she wanted more than anything in the world was to be a good wife and mother. Homemaking was her chosen career and she pursued it with passion. She was so happy to not have to work outside the home and to be able to devote her energies to her family. She had never been raised or taught the finer ways of life, and she wanted to give that to her children.

While in Paradise she served in many callings in the church including Relief Society President and as director of Girls Camp. She loved to serve and be involved in all that she could. She was constantly seeking to improve herself and to learn more. She was quick to say she wasn’t smart, but was equally as eager to find opportunities to learn. She was always attending the “know your religion” series or reading the paper. She loved to attend Education Week at BYU and would come home armed with books and tapes she would listen to as she worked around the house. She loved to listen to talk radio and write letters to the school board or city council when social issues concerned her. When she came upon a series of books about home organization she changed all of our lives forever. Sorting, cleaning, and labeling became a way of life. She spent so much time organizing, it made me wonder if it would have been faster to just lose something and look for it, but it gave her great pleasure. She would organize any kitchen she could get her hands on, and gave many lectures to groups about how to do so.

It was during this time she sought to begin traditions for her children, especially with the holidays in mind, most notably, the legendary “C* Christmas”. I think all the children, even me at age 3, agree we remember that Christmas on Wagstaff as one of our favorites. Mom said it was the first Christmas she ever had any money to spend, and she went hog wild. The joy she had at watching our delight at the magic of Santa planted a conviction in her to always make Christmas morning as magical as she could. There wasn’t a gift given that she didn’t choose very specifically and carefully, often fretting to the last that the receiver appreciate and love it as much as she hoped. She wanted to give us all she never had and more. “Life is hard enough” she would say. “I’m going to spoil them whenever I can.” And she did. She started a self imposed tradition of staying awake all night on Christmas eve, not only because of the volume of gifts she had to wrap, but because she insisted on being so meticulous about how she wrapped them. Her love was manifest in the coordinating ribbons and bows, and perfectly crisp corners of carefully selected wrapping paper. I could never figure out why she was so tired Christmas morning when Santa was the one who had been up all night. She also started a tradition that she would stay up all night after Thanksgiving so we would wake up to our house magically transformed and ready for the Christmas Season. I confess since I have had 6 children of my own and attempted to decorate with them awake I have wondered if her motive was more of convenience than surprise, but she would never have let us think otherwise. Then, that day we would pile in the suburban and drive to her favorite tree lot in Chico and pick out a Christmas tree. She always loved how the lot owner knew her by name and would often have a tree he cut with her in mind. From there it was off to see Santa, and then to McDonalds for breakfast.

There were the Easter treats from Joy Lyn’s candy with their handmade candy eggs and chocolate baskets, homemade divinity on Valentines day, picnic cake for the fourth of July, and Clam chowder (occasionally without the clams) on Christmas eve. For birthdays, she would always make a poster filled with photos of us from birth to display. Though her birthday was on Halloween, she never complained about it being about us and our trick or treating or parties. I think she loved having her birthday on a holiday, especially because of all the treats. She would always decorate to the hilt, and enjoyed the change in seasons.

When I was a freshman in high school, she was called to be a seminary teacher. While intimidated by the challenge, she put all of her energy into being the best seminary teacher she could. She not only spent hours studying the scriptures to prepare for her lessons, but spent as much time trying to ensure she conveyed to her students her love for them, and her desires for them to have a testimony of the gospel. A dear friend of mine sent me an email this week telling how her influence on him at that time remains a light in his life to this day.

She pursued the ideal in home life for herself and her children despite circumstances that constantly challenged her selfless desires. She had great sorrow and struggle in not having the type of support she longed for in trying to raise a family to the Lord. She wanted to give us what she had never had growing up, and fought everyday to try and do so. I cannot fathom the courage and faith it must have taken, and I will always admire her bravery.

Throughout her life my mother developed a Christ like charity, and could find the best in all around her. That woman made an awful lot of lemonade in her lifetime. Only she and the Lord know the courage it took for her to create her own happiness. I can only hope to appreciate it as I daily reap the benefits from it.

January of 198*, when I was the only one left at home, she decided it was time to start out on her own again and leave my dad. It was the start of a period of great uncertainty and turmoil as she struggled to enter a competitive workforce without the skills needed to make that easy. She put on a brave face and faith and did her best, always trying to stay positive. She worked several different jobs to keep afloat. She moved between Arizona, and California before finally landing in Utah. It was while working a phone sales job there that she started going by Lorraine (Babs was difficult to understand over the phone.) Finally, at the spry age of 54, she went to cosmetology school in Provo. There she thrived. While the book study was difficult for her, she blossomed in the association with her peers. She was loved by her instructors, and particularly fellow students who enjoyed her wit, optimism, and tenacity. She was so happy to finally feel like she had a direction for herself, and her confidence grew. But, always doubting her abilities, took a job in sales again after graduating.

In these years she sought to have as much fun and as many adventures as her time and meager means would allow. She loved to see her children and grandchildren whenever she could, her dear sister Peggy in Salt Lake, and extended family when possible. She relished a trip to Disneyworld with Doug and Shauna, and a month spent in Jackson Hole one summer with me. She was active in her singles ward and found a group of ladies she enjoyed going out with. She even did a little bit of dating and formed some more dear friendships. She loved going to the theatre, traveling, cooking, and being in nature. She loved Sundance and Jackson Hole, seeing Doug and Shauna in Idaho, and an occasional visit to the old stomping ground in Paradise. She beamed with pride about her grandchildren as they came along, and always had pictures of them up everywhere. She always thought her kids were the best and brightest, and as is typical of mothers, thought we were much better than we probably were. She continued to be faithful to her covenants, and was hopeful to someday be able to marry and spend the rest of her life with someone.

Early 2002 was a thrilling time for mom when she got to be a part of the Winter Olympics as a volunteer. Just like at the Strand Theatre in Iowa, she loved wearing her bright gold and black Olympic uniform and felt privileged to be a part of something so magnificent. Mom believed anything worth doing was worth doing well, and was inspired and awed by the majesty of the mountains, the athletes, and the spirit of the Olympics. It was later that year when she met Harold. Aunt Peggy said she was like a high school girl with a boyfriend, and was so happy to marry again in July 200*. I was her escort and the temple and got a little miffed that everyone kept asking if I was the mother of the bride, but mom thought it was hilarious. Before her illness took hold, she enjoyed being able to establish a home again, have someone to cook and clean for, and to travel and make new friends. She enjoyed working in the Mt. Timpanogos temple where they were married, and doing some genealogy. Mom loved a road trip, and she and Harold took many across the country in that little red Saturn. Mom was not a difficult person to please. A stop at a gas station for a coke and a candy bar could be the highlight of day. She was perfectly happy with a Motel 6 if it was clean and meant she could be on an adventure. I remember her recounting sleeping in a tent at some music festival while on their honeymoon, and how they had sat around listening to someone play the banjo and the dobro late into the night and what fun that was. She came on a girls trip to NYC when her granddaughter Amanda graduated from high school and traipsed all over that city without a word of complaint in the August heat. She was having the adventure of a lifetime, smiling and giggling the whole time. I remember she wanted me to take pictures of EVERYTHING so she could show Harold when she got home. She was so child like in her excitement of the big city and all the things to see, taste, and experience.

She was excited to be able to move to Idaho in 2007 and be closer to Doug and Brad. It was always good for her to have something to clean and organize, and a new house provided just the opportunity. While the loss of my sister Jodi was devastating for her, she was happy to be able to see Lucas more, and found hope in the future he could now have. She delighted seeing him in his plays and dance concerts, and was so proud of his efforts at school. Seeing him grow and progress helped ease her sorrow at the loss of his mother. In my head, I keep picturing Mom and Jodi laughing and giggling as they used to now that they are together at last, free from earthly cares.

She used to comment “Oh, so and so’s so classy…I’d like to be like that.” Without her noticing, her efforts day by day helped her become the woman she so admired. She was beautiful, classy, smart, kind, and above all selfless. She loved the Lord. She loved her testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ. She hated contention, and used to sing “Love at home” whenever we would argue. As much as we used to roll our eyes at that, that was what she wanted more than anything, for us to love one another.

Mom used to say she heard of gravestone engraved with the words, “She loved all, and all loved her”. She said she thought that was lovely, and would love for it to be said of her, and I think it’s safe to say that is true. That was how she tried to live her life. Even when it wasn’t easy, she tried to love all she met.

I am forever grateful to God for giving me such a mother. I testify of His goodness and grace, and love for each of us individually. I am grateful for temple covenants and the knowledge that I will be with my mother again, forever. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

*I was advised to leave out certain details to help prevent identity theft, hence the missing names/dates

A change of venue...

2011-10-18T09:43:00.000-07:00

Remember when this happened?

I do.

He doesn't.

At least not, enough.

Below is an actual "text-ersation" I had with Jack while I was out of town.

Jack: Rugby was good. My position is a jumper.

Me: What's a jumper do?

Jack: two people jump me into the air and then i have to catch the 'high' ball. then while i have the ball the two people use me as a battering ram and get me as far as they can before we all get tackled.

Me: You should not have told me that.

Jack: why?

Me: Because I love you and don't want you to get hurt?

Jack: they use my butt as a battering ram. not my face.

Me: That's only slightly better.

Jack: i will be fine. they said bruised butts broken coccyx or bruised elbows (they hold me by my armpits)

Me: I think you should stop talking now.

Me: Love you. Go to bed.

Jack: sorry? its better than a broken neck

Me: I guess that helps

I am assured its safer than football and lacrosse.

Wish us luck, we'll keep you posted.

Thank you for asking.

2011-10-10T18:20:00.000-07:00

For those who may not yet know, my mother passed away almost 2 weeks ago, Sept. 28, 2011. I was able to be by her side which I will always count as one of God's tenderest mercies to me.

I will share more about that when I am up to it, which I hope will be soon. There is just so much to process. In the meantime, thank you to all who have offered their condolences and kind inquiries into how I am doing. I feel actually remarkably well. The gospel of Jesus Christ makes that possible, and I am grateful.

In the meantime, I must continually remind myself that "six children is a lot". As I am home and trying to adjust from my mother's passing, while still not even close to being settled in our new house, I find myself repeating that to myself as a source of consolation and perspective. There is so much I would like to do in a day. For example, download my photos from our off-site server since they were all wiped off the hard drive when the computer crashed during the move. (Thankfully they are there, just not downloaded yet) Hence, no photos to post, until I sync my iPhone at least, so not tonight either.

Did I mention, six kids is a lot?

My BFF Jennie said once, "Having kids is like having a ball and chain on your ankle. Everything you do is just that much more difficult." I was of course initially shocked (as many often are with things Jennie may say), but as usual, I realized she was spot on. So when you are cruising around the race track of life, and you hitch yourself to one ball and chain on one ankle, you can get close to keeping your old pace. With two, it evens the strength in your legs and you can fake it pretty well. By the time you've got 3 on each leg, your attempt to make it around the track in a manner less than pathetic borders between hilarious and just ridiculous. Surprisingly enough, I still get up and try it everyday.

Which is what life is, ultimately, all about.

Misc. Observations from Moving in Day

2011-07-28T07:47:00.000-07:00

Our computer didn't enjoy it's trip in the moving van much, so I'm unfortunately unable to post any pics of the house or trip until we get it back. But for your amusement, or mine, I did keep track of some thoughts now that we have been in a sea of cardboard for a week.

1. I know a place where you can get a great deal on a refurbished refrigerator. It is also a great place to learn to negotiate while keeping one hand on your pepper spray in your purse. Cash only type store, naturally. Conveniently located next to pawn shops and bail bondsmen, should you have a need for that sort of thing. Thankfully, not located anywhere near our house.

2. "How can there be more boxes for the kitchen, the cupboards are full?!"

3. I have 7 frying pans. SEVEN. No wonder the kitchen cabinets are full.

4. Why don't they install pantry shelves far enough apart to stand a box of cereal on them?

5. The super nice guy who shows up on your porch is not a friendly neighbor. He is a meat salesmen who has caught you at a vulnerable, confused, sleep deprived, poor decision making moment. You pass it off to your husband who obviously is not thinking any clearer than you are, and before your refrigerator is delivered, your freezer is plugged in and full of half months grocery budget of meat. Still trying to figure out how that happened.

6. Screened porches make wonderful places to relax and have quiet time. Definitely my favorite part of the house when I ever find time to sit. They are also fantastic baby jails.

7. Do NOT send your oldest 2 children, who also happen to be your babysitters, on vacation out of state the week you move.

8. Do NOT let the baby teethe the week you move.

9. Do NOT get the stomach flu the week you move.

10. Mormons Rock. 3 people from our new congregation showed up today to babysit kids, bring dinner, and cookies. I could never do this without that.

11. No matter how much help you have, or how great things may in reality be, moving is still a HUGE pain in the patoot. It reminds me of being pregnant and just trying to get through a day at a time, knowing that eventually all the misery will be a distant enough memory, you think you're up to trying it again.*

*Note to self: You're NOT.

Moving is sooooo much fun!

2011-06-29T13:56:00.000-07:00

Ah, two weeks from today the moving truck will pull away with all our earthly possessions stowed inside. I will have been sipping lemonade while watching the strong and oh-so-careful packers gently tuck things into boxes as if they were their own. We can then hop in the car for a leisurely cruise in our SUV across these United States to beautiful, sunny, Atlanta. Our six children, who have been magnificently entertaining themselves since school got out, will sing songs, read books, and tell awesome chicken/road jokes along the way. We will memorize our "Family Move Scripture", and perhaps make up a song with lyrics about all the things we will miss (or not miss) about Minnesota. Everyone will be sure to use the rest room PRIOR to leaving the gas station, and nobody will want that nasty cuisine from restaurants that begins with "Mc". Along the way, we will strictly adhere to bedtime routines while staying in hotels. We will arrive in Atlanta refreshed and ready for our new life to begin.

Upon entering our new abode, I will have personal revelation about which furniture will be assigned to which room to prevent having to rearrange the heavy items once the movers leave. I figure it will only take 3 or 4 days before I find "a place for everything, and everything in it's place", just like my mother taught me. Then we can spend the rest of our summer at the pool while reading summer book lists so we are all ready for school to begin.

Yes, I think this is going to go just swimmingly.

Don't you?

I miss everything about you.

2011-06-05T20:54:00.000-07:00

In getting sentimental about leaving MN, I came across this classic. suffice it to say Ethan loves to play with my iphone as much as he loves music.

It's nice my children document themselves for me. Bad Mom. I know. (I can't tell you the guilt I have over missing taking photos the last day at their school....)

Long Board Science Project

2011-05-11T05:56:00.000-07:00

Easter Weekend in Atlanta

2011-04-25T19:34:00.000-07:00

In our excitement over being in Atlanta last weekend, I completely neglected the traditional Easter photos. (I think we were pushing our luck asking the Easter Bunny to find us as it was) Besides, you can't take Easter pictures without everyone, and since we left Susannah and Reed with kind friends (who are no doubt ready for us to leave after) the weekend, we can forgive ourselves, right?

The kids were very impressed with the cool trains from the terminal to the rental car facility. They were also very impressed it was 76 degrees and GREEN.

And while I don't have photos, Olivia was completely sold on the place once she had her first taste of Chick-fil-A chicken nuggets. Her love only increased for Georgia as we passed one on practically every corner. That girl is easy to please.

Next stop was the open house for the Atlanta Temple. A definite highlight of our trip. You can watch about it here. I can't describe how touching it was to be in the temple with my children. Just lovely.

Of course any stay in a hotel requires a dip in the pool, even if it is 11:00 o'clock at night and you were all up at 5:00 am for a flight. (And for mom who didn't get to bed 'til 1:30 the night before because the baby had an ear infection) The Easter Bunny will totally be able to be awake and able to wait for you all to fall asleep before leaving the loot.

Dad's new office! Bonus is that it's part of the distribution center, so bringing home frozen confections will be much easier than it is now. The kids can also gear up and see the ginormous freezer kept at -20f anytime they choose. In case we get to missing Minnesota winters.

The highlight for me of course, was having a perfectly legitimate excuse to eat at our favorite family restaurant (Maggiano's ) for Easter Dinner. We told the waitress we had to move from Minnesota because they closed the one in Minneapolis. (Atlanta has three :)

Of course there was more to love than Chick-fil-a, Maggiano's and Easter Candy. (What more could you need though, really?)

We met some very nice people, went to church, and even got the kids fantasizing abut a gorgeous SEVEN bedroom home we looked at. (Not in the area I think we'll end up, but it got them excited) Jared and I will head back soon for the heavy lifting of house hunting.

Did I mention it was WARM and GREEN? *sigh*

(34 today. fyi)

In the meantime, I'm busy, busy, busy, making our house here irresistible.

(more on that later)

I'll try to keep you posted.

Georgia on my mind

2011-04-15T06:21:00.001-07:00

Our Minnesota House

(uh...NOT in Winter)

I was planning on doing a nice long post on my (OLDER) friends 40th birthday, but things took a crazy turn when I got home.

Jared had a "surprise" meeting on Tuesday letting him know his position was being "eliminated" company wide. *gulp*

BUT, the great news is he was offered a promotion in Atlanta, Georgia, starting in June.

*gulp* We feel very, very, blessed that we have such a great opportunity, especially in this economy.

I should have seen this coming since I've been going on and on about how much we love Minnesota (despite the crappy weather) and how we hope to stay for a good long time. I guess when I joked we needed to move because the kids were getting midwest accents the Lord agreed.

And while there are many wonderful things here, bundling up my kids in their snow gear in APRIL and putting on a pot of chili to warm our bones TONIGHT WHEN IT SNOWS, are not on the "miss about Minnesota" list.

Besides, I think having my kids learn to say "Yes, ma'am" and "Yessir" will be positively adorable.

The Devil is in the Details

2011-03-30T06:58:00.000-07:00

Susannah, carefully folding rags to put away.

Reed, not so carefully un-putting them away.

I hate details. Hate them. I am a big picture kind of gal. I can even think up big pictures in great detail. I notice details. The little things that make the difference between excellence and ordinary. I make great judgements about others based on exacting details. I am constantly harping (pretty much everyone) about details. ("Put your shoes in your cubby", "Did you call the lawyer about that yet?", "Start with a capital, end with a period.", etc)

But ask me to be the one to execute the details, and I'd rather execute myself.

Doing a budget is like torture to me. Not because I'm opposed to a budget, but because I hate details. Planning my primary songs to teach from week to week? I have to FORCE myself to sit and focus on it for an hour to plan a month at a time. It makes me break out into a sweat. (I once knew a primary music leader who planned out the entire YEAR in advance. I'd stroke out)

I married under the assumption that if one of you is not a detail person, your spouse will be. Again, I didn't bother to check the details on that one. Apparently, neither did he.

I've had people they tell me they admire my ability to do "big" "courageous" things, like say, act as general contractor on our first house ever, or waltz into a school board meeting and tell them why their reading curriculum is hideous and what they need to do fix it. (and then personally oversee that it happens) I don't mind getting up in front of a large group and talking about pretty much anything. I'll even sing for them. No prob. Ten minutes notice to speak in church? Okay. Might not be the best talk ever, but I could do it. Sounds kinda fun actually.

I don't see what's so difficult.

But please don't ask me to plan out the next 10 years of family vacations. (I'll need a vacation to recover from all that planning.)

I've been very fortunate to have been blessed with at least 1 child who loves details. She keeps us all on task. Hands me the coupons at the grocery store checkout line. Reminds me to give people their medicine. Let's me know I promised them ice cream 3 months ago. Tells me how I'm 3 miles over the speed limit, etc.

Very helpful.

It's a curious thing that we admire and envy those who can so easily do what torments us. It's even more curious that we give ourselves so little credit for what comes easily, and question why others can't "just" do the same.

It makes me very glad for this scripture.

Building up my parenting self-esteem

2011-03-25T09:46:00.000-07:00

A short while back we had a really fun family night.

It was so touching when Jack brought down a certificate for me just before bed that read as follows:

"Parent Award for (fill in the blank) for being the Best of the Best parents anywhere

To mention only a few of your many honorable qualities: (fill in the blank)

You will be held in honor forever by your loving and dutiful (Son/Daughter) (fill in the blank)

Signed and delivered (fill in the blank)"

I looked at it, and though he had not taken the time to fill in the blanks, (he is a 13 year old boy), it was so sweet that he thought to retrieve and present it to me. I mentioned that maybe I could put it on my desk and he could fill it in for me.

((hugs)) and off to bed he went.

Fast forward a few days. Said (blank) certificate is still on my desk.

We come home from an outing which had apparently stirred some affection for me from Olivia. Having taken notice of the blank certificate on my desk, she was inspired to fill it out and present it to me.

She filled it in thus:

If you can read through the scribbles, it says: "To mention only a few of your many honorable qualities: WHEN YOU YELL AT US"

(It wasn't scribbled when she handed it to me) Puzzled, I asked, "You like it when I yell at you?"

Olivia responded, "That's one of your horrible qualities"

Thankfully, when I told her the word was "honorable" not "horrible", she quickly crossed out her remark.

I guess the good news is, even if I yell (sometimes), they love me, right?

Our Last Baby's First

2011-02-17T14:45:00.000-08:00

Is it just me, or does this one look like the E*Trade baby?

So excited for his birthday!

Just plain handsome.

Looking pensive. Or pooping.

"Ha Ha Ha. Mom said 'pooping'!"

This relationship was doomed to fail...

2011-01-31T06:45:00.000-08:00

Dear January,

It is time for our relationship to end. You have been nothing but cold to me. You think you are pure as your wind driven snow, but there is ice in your soul. Even your tenderest caresses give me chills, making me numb to your overtures.

We began the year with such promise, but you are nothing but a flake. You may dump your insults, another several inches of them today if you must, but I shall plow on.

I am leaving you for February, and though you may howl and weep, there is nothing you can do to stop me from moving on.

Warmest Regards,

Tiffany

What made my heart Smile today

2011-01-27T07:05:00.001-08:00

**sigh**

Dave Ramsey, Debt, and Dumpster Diving

2011-01-05T08:17:00.000-08:00

As a reward for all our hard work to pay off a lot of debt, we promised ourselves a family vacation this summer. Then we need to go to my niece's wedding, (which we unfortunately could not tag onto the vacation). Couple that with growing young men who want to experience Scout camp, High Adventure, Youth conference, and EFY, not to mention swim lessons, tennis, summer school, etc. When you add it all up, we needed some more cash. So even though I swore it off years ago, I got the dumb idea that maybe I needed to finally have the dreaded:

Garage Sale.

Because really, how much money can a 12 and 13 year old make? Not nearly enough to pay for all the above. I don't like to farm them out to babysit because I have first dibs on their time for that, and frankly, they are not skilled labor in any menial task. (I doubt anybody with cash in hand is willing to stand over them and nag as they weed or clean toilets, right?) It would take an entire summer's mowing to earn the cash they need, and with all those camps, they won't even be here to do it.

The deal was sealed yesterday afternoon when I noticed my neighbor, who is moving to GERMANY in 6 weeks, had this beauty parked in her driveway.

As I watched her husband throw in a perfectly good wheelbarrow and patio set, I could no longer take it. I swallowed my pride (she's moving to GERMANY, right?), and called to ask if we could do a little "dumpster diving". I swear I could hear her thinking "I'm so glad I'm moving to GERMANY" as she said, "Uh, sure. Whatever you want I guess. They're coming tomorrow to pick it up though."

So this AM I tromped out and began digging. My thoughts were thus the whole time:

"I could get $50 bucks for this!"

"If my husband's boss saw me doing this he'd give Jared a raise for sure."

"I bet I could get $100 for the patio set! That would almost pay for a week of Scout camp!"

"I bet my neighbor is soooo glad she's moving to Germany, where you surely won't have broke neighbors with 6 kids digging through your garbage."

"I just may have to keep this totally awesome wheelbarrow. I think I saw it at Costco for 100 bucks last spring!"

"I bet nice neighbor Susan, who just waved at me, is wondering if we're going to be the first neighbor into foreclosure."

"I wonder if anybody would pay for a 4 foot tall, wood statue of Brett Favre in a Packers uniform?"

Etc. Etc. Etc.

But after an hour, I have a garage full of loot, a sampling of which you see below. Suffice it to say, if my neighbor had called me first, should could have saved the $300 dumpster fee.

D*** that Dave Ramsey !

Reasonable Resolutions Rock

2011-01-03T10:45:00.000-08:00

(the kiddos, in full anticipation of the goodies that await downstairs Christmas Morn)

Last year I resolved to have accomplished 3 things only, and for them to all happen by the end of March. It had been a rough year, and I felt it was important to be kind and realistic with myself.

I am happy to report that I successfully achieved all of them within the time frame I had set for myself! By the end of March I had succeeded in 1. having a baby 2. losing 20 pounds 3. taking down my Christmas decor (the last was a nail-biter, I have to admit)

I was so pleased with myself, I even decided to take on something I had avoided my whole life. I decided to learn to make bread. Shocking, I know.

Again, although it took me until Thanksgiving to really test my first weak efforts, I managed to make the the MOST delicious, fluffy rolls for Thanksgiving. They were "freezer rolls" so I had actually sworn my way through the whole process wondering why I didn't just buy stupid Rhodes Rolls, but to my utter surprise and delight, come Thanksgiving day, they were fantastic! I was so surprised, I haven't had the nerve to make them since, afraid it was a fluke. Nonethless, I'm checking it off my list as a success.

So this year, I am feeling cautiously more ambitious. (really, I ought to know better)

I have managed to narrow my list down to a few items.

1. To write and submit an article for the BYU Alumni magazine. Not an article really, but little ditty telling how I have used my college education in an unexpected way in my life. The $50 check for accepted submissions is the golden carrot. (If I succeed, I think the prize should go towards a spiffy new pair of shoes for myself, but it will likely go toward our debt snowball to pay for said college education)

2. (upping the above ante) To write and submit an article to the Ensign Magazine. I am narrowing my list of possible topics, but I think I have an awful lot to say to folks, and flatter myself that someone else actually wants to hear it.

3. To pay off our last credit card and car payment, EVER! We have been working very diligently this year to get out of debt except the house, and it is looking within reach by March. (We will then attack those stubborn student loans with a VENGEANCE)

4. To shower before the kids get home from school. (Oh, wait. That's for today. sorry.)

So, there we are. I think I ought to be able to do those by March, and then I may go for one more by the end of the year. Like my usual, "get organized". LOL

The Origin of inner-sanctum nicknames

2010-12-31T13:41:00.000-08:00

Somehow each of our children has evoked some term of affection that sticks for a rather short duration. These are names we use only in the intimacy of our family unit, and rarely outside the home. The evolution is simplistic. They occur without any special thought or effort on our part. Jack was "Jack-a-roni" which strangely turned into "Jack-a-rone-stone" (?). Spencer was "Spency-wence" Not original, I know. Accordingly, it didn't last for long. Ethan is "E-man". The adult in a child's body, with a child's impulse control, is as applicable today as when he was 4 months old. Strangely, Olivia and Susannah both share "Deucey-do". The origin of that one is in large part due to them being feminine.

You see, their father turns to absolute mush for any babies, but when he had girl babies, he just lost all sense of, well, sense. He would pick them up and start baby-talking and saying, "You're so cutesy, woosie, deucey". Frequently for expediency, it would be shortened to "Deucey-doo!" as he would pick them up and twirl them around, which later evolved into "the Deuce". "Where's my deucey-doo?! " or "Hey! Deucy-doo!". Strange, babbling, baby talk, but it works for us, and it has stuck.

So when Reed came around, being masculine in nature, he did not qualify as a "Deucey-doo". He did however, quickly become "Reedy-boo". (Or, if you're Susannah, "Weedy-boo")

But this week, Reedy-boo evolved into:

Reedy-Boo-Boo

We hope to drop the second "boo" in about 3 weeks.

(This child is a sweet one I tell you!)

What you Dream if you have 4 sleep deprived nights and then decide you need to go to an hour long Zumba class.

2010-11-03T12:38:00.000-07:00

Your dream starts off with really, really craving Frosted Sugar Cookies. In part because after looking at the Zumba instructor and several other attendees, you realize that if you want to fit in here, you need to stop eating them, and you figure you'd better go get some while your metabolism is recently kicked up.

You then decide that as long as you're at the famous Carlo's Bakery (you did know that's where you were, right?) that you need to sample a few of those luscious cakes. So you pick out a few to take home.

Then you realize you can't possibly carry them all on your own to your car, so you ask the friendly employee for help. You are beginning to get nervous about how your husband is going to look at you as you walk in with all these cakes, and try to start thinking of a logical explanation. In a nano-second you realize there isn't one, and you decide to put that out of your mind for now. Must. Get. Cake.s.

She walks with you to a separate building where the cakes are actually made, and you start passing by all the bakers as they are leaving for the day.

"Wow!" you think. "That was FRANKIE!"

But then, be still my heart, headed the same direction you are, is none other than the host of Cake Boss, (steel yourself)

RYAN SEACREST*

But you are cool, collected. You brush with celebrities every day. "Hi, Ryan!" you casually remark as you descend the stairs alongside him. Ah, yes. "He must be impressed with how easy-going I am. Not one of those awkward gawkers." But finally, as you are about to part ways in a hall, you figure, "I really ought to take a picture. To show the kids." So in your coolest mom voice you say, "Would you mind if we took a picture?"

He graciously consents.

As you hand your cell phone to the nice girl helping you, you become suddenly self-conscious of exactly how outdated your phone actually is.

Then Ryan Seacrest puts his arm around you, and you can't help but notice that he is holding you especially close, and especially tight. You are about to say something about your husband, lest he begin thinking the two of you might have a future, when your 6 year old daughter wakes you up.

You know, the 6 year old daughter who had to come home from school after throwing up, even though you insisted her tummy didn't really hurt this morning? It couldn't after all.

You needed to go to Zumba.

*I swear on my love of Sugar Cookies I do not have any actual attraction to Ryan Seacrest.

But if I was 14 I might.

If you give a Reed a cupcake....

2010-10-25T18:31:00.000-07:00

He'll want some Daddy to go with it...

A boy after my own heart.

Sometimes I completely impress myself.

2010-10-13T17:21:00.001-07:00

And then I have a normal day.

Like one where at least 1 of my children has kept me from sleeping through the night, or I have to leave the house. Or someone is sick. Or it's not a full moon. You get the idea.

But sometimes, I do a really great job. And then I feel great about myself. And then I think how much better I must be than somebody else. So the Lord grants me a normal day again.

And I get over it.

Until I pray desperately for some sense of relief, or the ability to do more than it seems I think I possibly can, and I manage to pull off something pretty awesome again.

Obviously, today was more along the lines of normal. But that's ok. I'm due for an impressive day within a week or so. So when I post about it, don't be intimidated. (In case that's an issue for you)

Dappled Apples!

2010-10-11T11:38:00.000-07:00

For the first time since we moved to MN, we managed to get to the apple orchard!

I looooove going to pick apples. It just feels so "Fall-y". Not to mention, the apples make the BEST apple pie filling, which I make and freeze for later. I am very, very picky about my apple pie. If I'm going to blow 600 calories on a slice, it had better be up to snuff. So I make my own.

I would can my pie filling if I knew how. I keep hearing it's easy, but I can never bring myself to invest in the equipment to do it. The apple orchard manages to get a larger chunk of my cash than I always plan for to blow any more money on jars. Besides, if our power goes out here in the winter, I can stick it in the back yard to keep. Assuming it makes it past Christmas anyway.

So here are a few pics of our adventure! It even amazes me to see how big my own kids are getting, scary!

Even with the shadow, he looks cute!

Something about "Monkey's swingin' from a tree..." comes to mind...

I'm wondering if my lips have always looked crooked when I smile?

The biggest apples were up really high, so Jack had to help. I think this may be the last year he gets on his Dad's shoulders!
Olivia was happy to help as well.
Reed was just chillin'

What?! I have a blog?

2010-09-17T19:12:00.000-07:00

Since my last blog post:

I have turned one year older

My oldest child became taller than me

Reed sprouted 2 teeth (a nighttime bonding ritual I can't imagine missing someday)

Susannah became hyper (usually cute, but not when she screams "for fun")

I crawled across the end-0f-summer finish line and sent 4 of them back to school, most notably, on a bus. yipee!

I also realized:

I'm getting better with age

even if my thighs aren't.

Being crafty is not now, and never will be, part of my soul.

And the metaphor I've been saving for weeks is:

Having 6 children makes you feel like the ball in an old-fashioned pin ball machine. You know, where you are constantly pinging around the board with lights, and bells, and chaos until you sink down the hole. Then 2 seconds later you get shot out of the start position to do it all again.

But its fun, even if it is crazy.

My day was really off to a fine start until...

2010-07-15T15:38:00.000-07:00

the nice older gentlemen holding the door open for me remarked how spoiled my baby is to be carried around "like that".

Pleasant enough conversation until he said, "Who's doing the spoiling, mom...(obviously waffling)...er, grandma?"

Lucky for him I was wearing sunglasses, or my evil, laser glare, the one that makes my husband pee his pants (almost), would have melted him on the spot.

I then went home and burned the faded denim capris that I'd been wearing that I have long suspected made me look older than I am. I also think I need to buy some wedge sandals instead of my comfy and ever so practical cushioned flats. Stat.

The longer I let this one marinate, the worse it gets.

Summer Fun (thus far...)

2010-07-10T18:39:00.000-07:00

Cousin Lucas came to visit. They went to bed right away. Not.

Olivia loves tennis. Clothes.

Cousin Creed came to visit. Went to Basketball camp with Spencer. Same age. Not same size.

Slidin' Susie.

Dizzy Olivia.

Dutiful brother.

Because baseball games can be really slow.

Until this happens...!

I LOVE SUMMER

It's Great to be Eight!

2010-07-08T18:10:00.000-07:00

Congratulations to Ethan who is now an official member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! We had a great day with lots of friends and family in attendance!

He was especially happy I bought him his very own grown-up suit.

Here's the whole gang in attendance. We had given up serious and went for silly at this point.

(Honestly, how come it's so hard to take group pics?!)

We love you Ethan!

Blessed Baby

2010-07-07T11:39:00.000-07:00

We finally got around to giving this child an official name and blessing. Welcome (officially) Reed Douglas Damiano.

End of Middle (school, that is)

2010-06-10T11:12:00.000-07:00

My congratulations to Jack for surviving 7th grade MUCH better than I did.

I was very relieved to see that his teachers apparently know him well enough to honor him with a truly appropriate (while not entirely somber) award. If you can't read it, it says "Most likely to be Constantly Moving". Amen.

I was even more relieved to see that even if his report card grade doesn't reflect it and his attitude is not entirely positive, he IS managing to learn some Latin, as evidenced by a "Certificate of Merit" on the National Latin Examination. (Woohoo!) He officially now has a subject I can no longer help him study for!

And for your amusement, Jack shared with me some of his favorites from his Art Teachers "Quote Wall". As I'm sure you imagine, any Middle School teacher has to have a great sense of humor to keep sane. Mr. Kamarath keeps himself in a mirthful way by keeping a list of his favorite things actual students have said. (Some of the below may or may not have been contributed by Jack himself)

"Hey, it's like a rainbow without the colors!"
"Stop being egoistic!"
"I want to be the first president of the United States when I grow up."
"I need a bland-aid."
"They make ten dollar bills?"
"Your hair sounds Jamaican."
"Ouch, I just painted myself."
"I meant the flavor was 'white'."
"I get itchy when I lawn the mow."

And my personal favorite:
"Girls can tell colors just by looking at them."

My Favorite Go-to dinners!

2010-05-21T09:58:00.000-07:00

(I can't find my camera to take a picture of my chili, but I thought you'd enjoy a shot of me with my TEENAGER on his birthday. And yes, he loves both these dinners!)

I am posting these 2 recipes not only for my friend Amy (who's about to have a baby and wants some good make and freeze recipes), but because I have been asked for the recipies more than once.

These are great, not because it's necessarily my first choice to impress company, but because they consistently taste great, are cheap, and most importantly, the kids gobble them up.

Another tip, I always brown my ground beef in the crockpot. Weird, I know. I dump it all in (sometimes from frozen cubes, or the fresh big costco packs!), sprinkle with dried onion for flavor, and set it on high. I then do whatever, stopping to stir it occasionally, and about an hour later I have perfectly browned ground beef! Easy-peasy. I will usually brown 2-3 lbs. at a time and divvy them up for these 2 recipes. Sometimes I'll just bag it and freeze to reuse in these recipes later. The chili is really fast if you have the beef all ready to throw in the pot.

First up: Weeknight Chili

I actually got this recipe off the grocery store shelf on one of those little cards shortly after we were married. It's been a keeper ever since. I can't tell you how many people have told me they love it, and they don't normally like chili. Please don't do anything to make it weird. You just won't get the same results. I am even very strict about which BRAND of chili powder to use (McCormick ONLY please). I have tried others and it ruins it. If you do insist on going rogue, don't attach my name to the recipe. I have a reputation to uphold.

1/2 lb. ground beef
2 cans red kidney beans undrained (white and black acceptable in a pinch)
1 (8 oz) can tomato sauce
1 T. white vinegar
2 T. McCormick Chili powder
2 T. instant minced onion
1/4 tsp. garlic salt
1 tsp. sugar

Brown the ground beef until no longer pink, stirring frequently, drain fat.
Dump in everything else, bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer 20 minutes
Serve with sour cream, cheese, fritos (yummy!) or whatever suits your fancy.

**This is better the longer it simmers. I usually double (quadruple actually, but we're a big family), then freeze half for later. The frozen stuff is always more flavorful from the flavors melding.

Beef and Bean Chimichangas:

1 lb. ground beef
3/4 Cup chopped onion (or dried onion already in ground beef)
3/4 cup diced green or red bell pepper
1 can whole kernel corn
2 cups taco sauce (1 reg. size jar, large one if doubling)
2 tsp. chili powder
1 tsp. garlic salt
1 tsp. ground cumin
1 (16 oz) can refried beans
flour tortillas
16 oz. shredded cheese (Monterry Jack or cheddar)
1 T. butter, melted

(If you haven't pre-cooked your ground beef, brown first, then drain fat. Unless you're feeling rebellious, then skip the fat drain part. I of course would never do such a thing.) To browned ground beef add onion, bell pepper, and corn. Cook for 5 minutes, or until veggies tender.
Add remaining ingredients(EXCEPT Cheese) and mix together. Cook until heated through.
Spoon beef mixture down center of tortilla (careful not to overfill, amount depends on size of tortilla), top with as much shredded cheese as desired. Continue until you run out of tortillas or filling for them!
Roll, and place seam side down in 9x13 pan or baking sheet.
Brush with melted butter. (Don't skip this part! It makes them slightly crispy, i.e. delicious!)
**At this point you can freeze them for later, or bake right away for dinner**
Bake at 350 for approx. 25 minutes. (Longer if cooking from frozen)

Serve with lettuce, tomato, guac, etc. as desired!

Bum-her.

2010-05-13T07:45:00.000-07:00

Random Thoughts

2010-05-06T07:44:00.000-07:00

1. Is it okay to let your kids have Top Ramen for breakfast? I couldn't come with a good reason not to. I made them have a banana and milk with it, just in case.

2. If you're going to plop your almost 2 year old in front of sign language videos, it would be helpful to watch them yourself a few times, so that when they are frantically signing at you in Target you know what they're talking about. Mental note.

3. I should never, ever go into Target with money in my paypal account without a destination. Destination: Target.

Spring Break - A belated report, part 2

2010-04-28T07:35:00.000-07:00

Our whole Spring Break adventure got kicked into high gear when Uncle D and Aunt S invited and Jack and Spencer to be companions for Lucas on their trip to So Cal.

Until about a year ago, D & S were "empty nesters", and even though they're super fun to be around, they're not necessarily going to go on "Tower of Terror" with a 13 year old. Everyone knows you really need someone to squeeze when you are in the throws of terror, and who better than your tween-age cousins? Plus, Jack and Spence got to see their cousin Matt, fresh home from his mission, and Amanda, busy working pro in SoCal. How could we say no?

So, even though Ethan and Liv were super jealous, we put them on a plane (all by themselves!) and sent them on their way. (It is also fair to say, I was extremely jealous myself)

Jack was good about "texting" me all the details of their adventure, and the couple times we did call, they sounded so tired they could barely speak. Awesome.

Doesn't it just thrill your heart to see your kids having so much fun?! MUCHAS GRACIAS to Uncle D and Aunt S!!!! "Next year, in the Holy Land!"

What good lookin' young men! Waiting in line for "Nemo"

Being "Goofy"

Getting Sick

As it turns out, Spencer's not a big fan of "Tower of Terror", but he did find some rides he liked.

Spring Break - A belated report, part 1

2010-04-25T20:15:00.000-07:00

Even though Spring Break was a month ago, I figured I'd fill everyone in on the details!

Last year, I swore that no matter what we were going to get out of this frozen tundra for spring break! (However, getting pregnant and being due in FEBRUARY, it pretty much demolishes that.) However, as bad as not getting out was going to be, the idea of being cooped up in the house with all the kids for a week, 4 weeks postpartum, was even worse. So we devised a plan.

We split everyone up, a 3 part plan. Part A of the plan was Olivia's "trip". She was to stay home with Mom, Susie, and Reed, and have a special "Shopping and Pampering trip", full of her favorite things, shopping for clothes and "manicures". (Thanks to Aunt Shauna for introducing her to nail polish...) I arranged for a sitter for Susannah for a couple of afternoons, and we took off to the Mall of America one day, and to Target and our local Korean establishment another! In between were playdates with friends that included cupcake-baking, screaming on the swingset (not sure why...), and watching "Rapunzel Barbie" (yes, it's just as painful as it sounds.)

First, a "fashion show, of our outfits from Target...

Lovely manicure! (note the flowers on the thumbs...)

The American Girl Store is like, miniature female nirvana...

Everything you could think of, even a special hook for Julie in the restroom. (Why don't they have these for REAL babies?!)

Really, how happy (and spoiled) can a girl be?

Mommy needs a coke to keep up with it all. (Note my own lovely manicure, my first ever I might note.)

I have to say we had a lovelytime, but Mommy was very, very tired after 2 1/2 days of this. (There's just no way shopping with a 4 week old is "pampering") But we made a lot of lovely memories!
Tomorrow, part 2- Jack and Spencer's California Adventure!

We're So Glad When Daddy Comes Home!

2010-04-16T10:05:00.000-07:00

Six kids. Six days. Solo.

'nuff Said.

Why I HATE "The Bachelor"

2010-04-11T20:00:00.003-07:00

(Nothing personal Jake, I'm sure you're a very sweet spirit)

It is probably strange that I would blog about this because I haven't had cable TV for over 3 years. But I have seen a couple of minutes from a few episodes of the aforementioned TV "Reality" show, and I just couldn't refrain from venting about it.

I have come across several other blogs where people comment and dish on the latest episode, and it leaves me scratching my head. Is THIS what feminism has gotten us?

Why on earth would any halfway intelligent, beautiful, woman of CHARACTER, think that THIS is the best method of "catching a man"???? Let's see, I think I'll seclude myself in a mansion with other "beautiful, accomplished" women, tear them to shreds in the cattiest of ways, then try to figure out how to dress and act more slutty, I mean, seductively, than they do, so "He will pick ME".

And of course, what a peach he must be. Poor guy. Just can't figure out which girl he'd really like to "commit" to. This one has such great legs, and this one such great "t...eeth", but this one told a funny joke, etc. etc. etc. But they're all such really good kissers...hmmm. Life is really, really so hard. Especially when you're living in mansions, taking limos and helicopters on dates, and eating sushi in the hot tub. The fire of adversity is really the best place to evaluate the future mother of your children, I see.

How did feminism go from telling stay at home moms like me I'm "undervaluing myself", to turning women into desperate, catty, prostituting, objects of desire?

Who is really "liberated" here? Seems to me we've given "The Bachelor" a better life than ever!

New Life

2010-04-11T19:40:00.000-07:00

This sweet little flower bloomed in my front yard last week. I was so happy I could have cried. Springtime has finally come to Minnesota. And, an early spring at that.

I feel I can relate to this little flower. For the last 9 months or so I have felt like an gnarly little bulb, stuck in some deep, dark, cold place. All alone, trying desperately to make something beautiful. No matter how much effort I put into what was happening deep within me, I was helpless to speed up the process, to bring it to light, to let the both of us feel the warmth of the sun that would come. No, I just had to wait. I had to wait while the winds howled and the ice paralyzed.

But then one day, it was time. I have finally been freed from the confines of "bulb-ness". I can feel the warmth of the sun. My work is done, my flower is here. I have a beautiful new bloom bursting with color and beauty. I can breathe in its beautiful scent. I feel light, and open, and happy to welcome any who pass my way.

I look on my garden and feel grateful. Privileged to have nurtured 6 little bulbs, and relieved the dark days of winter are past.

What a glorious thing Spring is!

My Peeps

2010-04-08T19:44:00.001-07:00

My Peeps have spoken.

Continue blogging, I will.

My Peeps need me.

Happy Easter!

2010-04-04T16:39:00.000-07:00

As far as Easters go, this one's been a keeper! It was a balmy 64 degrees complete with an OUTDOOR Easter egg hunt, enough chocolate to make us all sick for days, and a stay-at-home-Sunday to watch General Conference.

p.s. I know my postings have been infrequent, but if anyone still reads this, a comment to let me know you're there would be appreciated. My vanity would like to think there are people I know who find me interesting, but if not, I should probably consider retiring from my wildly successful blogging career. (The advertisers are weeping at the revenue they would lose I'm sure)

Merci Beaucoup

2010-03-22T12:23:00.001-07:00

The only "problem" with getting a ton of baby gifts is the amount of time it takes to write Thank You notes that very likely fail to convey my gratitude. (yes, I know that's a run-on sentence)

Alas, I shall persevere.

It's raining, it's pouring, the new mom is snoring...

2010-03-11T08:10:00.000-08:00

Reed smiling at the thought of all his new clothes...

Tuesday night my friend Hollie threw Reed and I a lovely baby shower! Much thanks to our very generous friends! He will definitely be the best dressed child in our family! I felt strange having a shower for my 6th child, but it was really nice. (I hadn't kept as many boy baby things as I thought...) So blessed to have such nice friends and neighbors!

And speaking of showers, winter is finally coming to an end here in Minnesota. It has been rainy all week, melting the 4 foot drifts of snow along the roads. We even have thunder and lightning here this morning which only means one thing. We have left winter and are officially entering TORNADO SEASON! (See, the weather doesn't always suck in Minnesota)

And finally, it seems that a side effect of this last pregnancy is that I now officially snore. (Although not as often or for as long as I might like...) Poor Jared doesn't know what to do with me. It has left him wondering how I've lived with him so afflicted the last 15 plus years. Do you think it will last? I'm sure it has something to do with "advanced maternal age".

Song and Dance Man

2010-03-07T09:23:00.000-08:00

Last night we packed our whole clan, including Grandma, to trek to the Stake Center for Youth Cultural Night. I may not be able to make it to church yet, but by golly, I was gonna watch my boy do the hoe-down.As you can see, he was the star "flipper"!
Doing the "WAVE" (Authentic Pioneer choreography)
The handsomest par'dner to be sure...
The entire event was entirely delightful, and I was so proud of my growing up boy!

Baby Pics!

2010-02-28T20:44:00.001-08:00

I hope posting more pictures will help you forgive me for not providing a witty or profound narrative to accompany them. Any witty or profound thoughts these days are had in the middle of the night while feeding, and due to drugs and an irregular sleep schedule, those thoughts cannot be trusted without first being thoroughly censored. Then by the time I get to a computer, they have vanished forever anyhow.

Much thanks to Grandma Damiano for all of her hard work taking over most of my daily life! It has afforded me the chance to enjoy baby and recover much better than I could ever do without her!

(the pics with Olivia are of her supervising and approving Reed's "coming home" wardrobe, which she hand selected. She also likes to lay out which clothes he will wear tomorrow, with accompanying socks and burp cloths...)

Reed Douglas Damiano

2010-02-17T21:02:00.000-08:00

We are really blessed!

BEFORE!

2010-02-17T07:01:00.001-08:00

On our way to the hospital!

I am being a rebel patient and wearing make-up even though my pre-op lady told me not to. I'm sorry, but this is not my first trip to the rodeo, and until I can be convinced of complications in child birth due to cosmetics, I refuse to cooperate. Seriously folks, 30 minutes after I deliver the fluids will make me look 50 pounds more than I actually weigh, so I need the dignity of mascara and lipstick.

Giddy-up!

Pandora's Box

2010-01-30T11:30:00.001-08:00

It is with great trepidation I put this out there, but as we are approaching a deadline with no solid ideas, I think it couldn't hurt.

We have yet to come up with a name for this new, male offspring. So now is your one and only chance to give your two cents. (After the child is officially born and named, please feel free to keep your two cents.)

Our current guidelines automatically reject anything that
1)starts with a "J"
2) ends with a "d"
3) is androgynous

Come on all you lurkers, give us some ideas. I just know you're itching to.

New Years Resolutions

2010-01-29T15:41:00.000-08:00

Aren't you proud of me? It's the end of January, and I still remember them!

As an update, I made a resolution to try to complain as little as possible this pregnancy, regardless of how much it sucked. That is probably why I have done so little blogging...

Anyhow, I decided to make realistic, achievable goals for myself this year. I came up with 3. All of which I thought I could for sure accomplish by the end of March.

1. Get un-pregnant.
2. Lose 20 lbs.
3. Take down my Christmas decorations

I'm not so sure number 3 is going to make my deadline. I'll keep you posted as to the rest.

Approximately 3 weeks to go for the big day! (More or less, don't hold me to a date or I may get REALLY crabby)

Living Happily Ever After

2010-01-19T11:56:00.000-08:00

16 years ago after my husband and I were recently engaged. As most of you know, the vast majority of our courtship/enagement was long distance. One evening he called me per our usual routine, and he was especially effusive in his devotion to me.

He had been relaying to me that earlier that evening he had done dishes for his family after dinner, and explained how much he hated doing dishes. But it had put him to thinking. He loved me soooooo much, that he promised that after we were married, he would see to it that I would NEVER have to wash another dish again. Ever. He didn't want his beloved to ever endure the agonies of dishwashing.

Thankfully, I had enough sense to get a really good laugh out of that. I gratefully explained that although very sweet, it was highly unrealistic, and that as much as I appreciated the sentiment, I thought it was important we not start off by making promises we would not be able to keep. He insisted he would do it.

It lasted 2 days.

However, I bore him no ill will, I knew it was inevitable. Sweet, but inevitable.

But this story does have a happy ending after all. You see, although he was not able to carry out that particular act of kindness, he is still the same selfless, wildly-in-love-with-me man I married. (Still not entirely sure why, I try not to ask)

Here I am, 35 weeks into gestating our sixth child, and pretty much an invalid. My major accomplishment of the day is getting my kids to school (not necessarily on time), maybe getting a shower, and possibly throwing a load of laundry in the wash. The rest of the time I'm in between bed and the lazy boy chair.

So how is he handling all this? Far better than I would.

The last couple of weeks he has amazed me with his generosity and kindness regarding my condition. That same selfless young man I married is out in full force.

It would be too long of a list to make, but a sampling of his kindnesses to me recently include:
*Pouring me a hot bath first thing in the morning to ease my aching muscles
*Making me breakfast in bed
*Staying up much later than he would have liked to fold and put away the mountain of laundry I could only manage to get washed and dried.
*Getting all 5 children dressed and ready for church so I only had to focus on dressing myself
*Making every meal all weekend long, doing all the accompanying dishes, and even making cupcakes with Olivia.
*Bringing me home sugar-free, carbonated, icy cold caffeine
*Surprising me with a painting project I've wanted to do for 6 months (the loft looks so awesome honey, thanks!)
*Giving up his "electronic gadget" slush fund so I could buy the aptly named lazy-boy recliner

Not sure how I managed to get so lucky.

I love you, honey!!!!!

"Like Normal People"

2010-01-12T07:10:00.000-08:00

I have long struggled to keep my home to the cleaning standards that were my mothers. I have gone over, around, and through why I can't seem to maintain the same degree of excellence. I have told myself there were weekly housekeepers (2 actually) who worked alongside her, a and guy to do the yard. Her greatest hobby was "organizing", and I don't ever remember her sitting to watch TV or a movie without the ironing board set up in front of her. I don't remember her doing anything leisurely at all, in fact. She was always cleaning, organizing, or decluttering something.

Fast forward to me. While I was never slovenly, and loved the order around me, I was personally responsible for a very small portion of it. Too small I realized, and decided that my children would share in some of the responsibility for their benefit as well as mine. Hence, for the last 12 years, I have tried again and again to train them how to do what needs to be done to attain the same order. I have failed to achieve consistent results. I do accept the blame for this one, as I can't seem to figure out who else's fault it is. I am still trying to accept the fact that it is okay that I am not willing (apparently) to do what it would take to make my house constantly spotless for whatever reasons, despite the fact that it torments me.

Fast forward to yesterday.

My eldest child, who shall remain nameless, was loading the dishes into the dishwasher. (SEE! I am getting them to help some!) said to me, "I have made a New Year's Resolution for our family."
I said, "Really? What do you think it should be?"
"I think we should try to keep our house clean

like normal people,

like you know the ______'s or the ________'s."

Poor child. He should never have said this to a woman who is 8 months pregnant with her 6th baby.

I said, "So, (nameless child), if you want a clean house like normal people, you can start by putting your dirty clothes in the laundry like I'm always asking, or clearing your own dishes, or putting your shoes away, or taking out the garbage when it's your chore and not accidentally 'forgetting' half the cans in the house, or stuffing candy wrappers into the couch cushions, or etc, etc, etc." (You get the idea)

That phrase tormented me (and resulted in me tormenting everyone else) for the rest of the evening. But guess what?

When I got up this morning, I found that the nameless child had made his bed, all on his own, for the first time in recent memory.

I think there may just be a glimmer of hope in my future.

Counting on a Saturday

2010-01-09T19:44:00.000-08:00

ONE Trip to Costco
TWO Full carts later
THREE Hours to put it away
FOUR Friends over for playdates
FIVE The time they all finally left, and the high temperature of the day.
SIX Mouths to feed
SEVEN More weeks to go
EIGHT Things to iron for church
NINE Fights over video games broken up
TEN Seconds before I fall asleep...

My Favorite Christmas Movie

2009-12-16T08:13:00.000-08:00

Several years back I had a spell of insomnia, during which time I became hooked on "Turner Classic Movies". It is when I first fell in love with the name Olivia (after Olivia DeHavalind), and where my crush on Jimmy Stewart was carved in stone. It is also the first time I saw "Christmas in Connecticut".

Every year I just HAVE to watch this one at least once. It's not so much a Christmas Story as a romance that happens at Christmas. I could poke all kinds of holes in the plot, but by golly, I love it.

Barbara Stanwick is divine, and she and Dennis Morgan have the greatest chemistry. It makes me all sentimental and romantic. (Jared and I first started "dating" around Christmas time and it makes me all twittery to think about it...)

Every time I see it I vow that in the next life I too will wear gowns, mink coats, and silk blouses with high waisted trousers. My nose will never need powder, or my lipstick touching up. Instead, I will be ready at a moments notice for a romantic sleigh ride in the snow with my dashing leading man. All while being a wildly independent woman of the world, naturally.

So if you're looking for a video to keep you awake as you wrap up your gifts, get this one. (But whatever you do, be sure you do NOT get the awful Dyan Cannon, Kristofer Kross remake, mmmK?)

Dear Santa, I need hired help.

2009-12-14T19:45:00.000-08:00

I can think of 50 different reasons people would hire a surrogate.

I don't mind being pregnant, at least not enough to hire a surrogate, but could I hire a maid and a cook while I am? (A chauffer would be nice while I'm at it...)

Love,
Tiffany

Calm-pound Words

2009-12-10T09:07:00.000-08:00

The other day Olivia and I were unloading the dishwasher together.

"Mommy, I know what a compound word is."

"Really? That's great. What are some compound words?"

She proceeded to list a few, some compound, but mostly just 2 syllable words. So together we talked about how a compound word is two words put together to make a new word. That for a word to be a compound word, both parts have to be a word all by themselves.

She lit up.

"I know! 'Compound' is a compound word!" she said.

"Really?" I said. "I know 'pound' is a word, but what about 'com'?"

"You know, how when we're being noisy you always tell us to 'com' down?"

I laughed and told her she was right.

All that schoolin' is really paying off.

Twitchy

2009-12-09T21:55:00.000-08:00

It's 11:55 pm, and zero degrees outside. (Not sure about the wind chill). I would really love to go to sleep. But I can't. I'm twitchy. Not just in my legs, but in my hands tonight too. So, I'm standing at my desk, doing a midnight version of the hokey pokey while I surf the internet, hoping to get it all out so I can go back to bed.

Isn't being pregnant AWESOME? Twitchy is almost as fun as gestational diabetes (which came back just in time for the holidays...)

**I just chose this picture because E likes to be featured....

Happy Birthday! (Don't worry, different kid)

2009-12-02T17:07:00.000-08:00

We love you Olivia!
You keep your Mommy organized, and you paralyze your Father's will with a smile, what would we do without you?
Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!

2009-12-01T07:53:00.001-08:00

We love this kid!
Spencer, you are a joy to have in our home!
Happy Birthday!

Thanksgiving Weekend

2009-12-01T07:19:00.001-08:00

Given my gestational state, we opted to use all of Jared's "Marriott Gold" status and camp out at a hotel this Thanksgiving with our friends the Minnicks. We also had a fantastic dinner at Maggiano's with no dishes and enough leftovers for 2 days. Excellent.
Father and Son
The "Crabtree Curse" AKA sugar addict
Spencer, John and Natalie, (baby Nila), Tiffany
The cute kiddos...
Ahh, beds you don't have to make...
Even Susie was kickin' it
What's a hotel without a pool?
Splish Splash
She was havin' a blast...
FYI, the candy is already off this sucker...

Sticky Rice and Housekeeping tips that would Mortify my mother

2009-11-17T07:14:00.000-08:00

In the 12 plus years since we've had children, I have learned a thing or two that can only be learned by experience in regards to keeping house.

Today, we'll talk about rice.

First off, if you try to sweep the kitchen floor after a meal that includes rice, all you end up doing is smearing half the rice all over the floor, and sticking the other half of it to your broom.

So what has this taught me? It's best to wait to sweep until breakfast the next morning when the rice is now hard and crunchy on your floor. It sweeps up much easier. Heck, you can even vacuum it.

Yes, I know that would disgust Martha Stewart. But I do think she could respect my next discovery in regards to rice. Rice Krispies to be exact.

If you ever happen to run out of super glue, but you have some Rice Krispies in your cupboard, take comfort. You see, all you have to do is wet a dozen or so pieces of cereal in milk, sit them on the surface requiring adhesion, and let them dry for about an hour. I have never actually had to do this, but I know it will work because if I let a bowl of Rice Krispies sit on the counter for an hour before someone gets around to rinsing them out, it pretty much takes a chisel to pry those suckers off the bowl.

I guess that's where the term "Sticky Rice" must come from, right?

3 years and counting...

2009-11-11T15:54:00.000-08:00

(What children who aren't watching TV may end up doing instead...)

This August marked our 3rd year of no cable TV. No TV antenna. I read the book "Unplug the plug-in drug" and in desperation to help improve the quality of our home life and my children's education and general well being, we pulled the plug. That's not to say we don't use the television. We have DVD and VHS machines. We subscribe to Netflix. We have the internet. We subscribe to the Wall Street Journal. But WE choose what comes into our home.

This was not our first attempt. But it was the first time it stuck. It was brutal at first. What do you do with all the quiet? The kids thought they would die. So did I. They were so "there" all the time, demanding my attention. (It was very cold turkey the first 2 weeks, no screens period.)

But eventually, something happened. They went outside. They played with the massive collection of Legos I had almost given to Goodwill. They brought out their toys. And played with them. I had more time to read. To put them to bed. To go to bed myself. Before we knew it, it was normal to not have background noise all the time. I stopped feeling like I needed to yell all the time so they'd hear me.

We have some good friends who have never had cable, and I used to marvel at them. They would always say, "I don't know how people have time to watch TV", and I now know exactly what they mean.

I of course waste plenty of time on the internet. There are days I'm desperate to just sit down and "veg out" in front of a screen. But the thankfully, it usually proves to be too cumbersome to make it come to pass, so I am far more likely to spend time doing something I actually care about, rather than procrastinate it.

I really enjoy reading headlines and thinking about what they mean, rather than having somebody else tell me what to think. Baseball games are a lot more fun to listen to than watch on TV. I love my kids not knowing "what they're missing" at the movies, in fashion, in Hollywood. I love not knowing who certain celebrities are, or what movies are coming out. That's not to say I wouldn't love "Dancing with the Stars", and I especially miss the Olympics and the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. But the trade off for a less clutttered mind is worth it. I am pop culture illiterate, and that's okay with me. I love the silence. I can't stand the noise of TV.

We still haven't reached my utopia of endless book reading, gardening, or model building, but we're closer than we ever had any chance of being that way to begin with. At least we can get homework done, read a book, or just play Uno.

I hope no one interprets this as a self-righteous lecture, I really don't feel that way at all. But if you're looking for some peace in your life, I highly recommend giving it a try!

I am pregnant. Hear me Roar.

2009-11-05T10:19:00.000-08:00

This morning I woke up mean.

No particular reason.

I knew something was amiss, but wasn't fully cognizant of my temperament until about 5 minutes before loading everyone in the car for school.

It dawned on me that everything I had said all morning, regardless of intent, came out more like snarl than an instruction or question.

Yes, Jared's been out of town, but he's not usually part of my morning routine anyhow. I had plenty of sleep. When I started crying on the way home thinking of what an unpleasant mother I am, it hit me.

I'm a walking horomone today. I feel tired to my core. I want to cry just thinking how tired I feel. As Susie had gotten up extra early, she went down for her nap early as well and I joined her. I had angry dreams for 2 1/2 hours. (All I remember really is throwing a bunch of dishes at my husband because HE wasn't "mad enough" about something I thought he should be madder about) I woke up still feeling crabby. And tired.

And so I've decided. Even though I must venture out in public to buy sustenance for my family today, I am to speak to NO ONE. I am not to try to redeem coupons, and I definitely cannot go to WalMart (as previously planned). It's all about survival. (For anyone in my path. Kind of like Edward in TWILIGHT)

I will post photos of my earlier triumphs this week. Apparently, all my expended energy to vacuum everything in sight and clean out cupboards/closets you previously could not OPEN, has caught up with me. I need to remind myself why I feel like this, and to console myself that if the kids toy room has looked this bad for this long, it can wait for another day...

This closet was formerly practically impossible to open. 2 bags of trash and one bag to Goodwill later...I could move in.

We'll see how long the "under the sink" magic lasts, but isn't it pretty?

It's the little things really

2009-11-03T18:21:00.000-08:00

I'm in love.

With my new vacuum.

Ours died a couple of weeks ago, I declared to my hubby that the time had come to INVEST in a vacuum. (As opposed to the $150 model we keep buying every 18 mos...X the last 15 years...you do the math)

I did my due diligence. Even borrowing some from friends to try out. But today, confused by the mire of internet reviews, I actually stepped into a vacuum shop and came out with true love for $100 less than I was thinking I had to spend.

I spent the afternoon vacuuming. Again. Even after scouring our carpets yesterday with 2 different, expensive, models, this thing sucked up everything that was left and makes my carpets look gorgeous. Glory be, it does hardwood as well, no special adjustments necessary.

I'm so inspired I may actually clean something besides my floors.

It weighs 8 pounds. Has a 5 year warranty, lifetime belt, and free yearly tune up.

Who knew I'd finally reach this point in my life? A vacuum making me so content. (Especially because it's light enough for the kids to do all by themselves!)

Boo!

2009-11-02T18:38:00.000-08:00

Jack was a classic. Dream job costume. Spencer? A "smartie" pants.
Illustrating the differences between male and female, "scary guy" and "flower fairy"
Susannah the fierce lion, with her fairy friend.
The ultimate power couple...

Blindness of our Minds

2009-10-27T08:46:00.001-07:00

Have you ever wanted something so badly that you were completely blinded by what you were actually doing? You know, the times when you used noble words like "committed", "faithful", "true", "loyal", "right"? Those times when your opinion of yourself and your actions is justified, and even noble. You reinforce your justification of your chosen course by telling yourself that your actions, though "not understood" by people whom you would normally respect, are higher and nobler than they can possibly understand. Our superior understanding of the situation, and more importantly, our intentions gird up and fortify our objective. Hence, we proceed to move forward, blinded by WHAT WE WANT, not seeing the potentially devastating consequences.

I have a LOT of examples of this in my life. I was convinced I wanted to marry a certain young man for whom I'd wasted 2 years "waiting" while he served a mission. Never mind that any logically thinking person could see once he got home and we were together what a stupid match it would be. No. I WANTED IT. There was no reason a girl like me and boy like him couldn't have what we wanted.

Then there was the time I WANTED to have a picture perfect, Martha- Stewart- Envy- Inducing- Cookie -Exchange, and dadgum if I wasn't going to MAKE it happen. I spent hours scouring the internet, coming up with all the right details, including "The Rules". (Any self respecting cookie exchange surely has rules to keep it from falling into the flotsam of a Homemaking Meeting Potluck) So naturally, when a girl I visit taught* called 2 hours before the party to tell me her cookie press had broken, and would it be okay if she came with (gasp) no cookies, I TOLD HER "NO".

So how is it that at this stage in my life I can look to these examples and identify them as times when my mind was "blinded"? What finally "snapped me out of it"?

Sometimes, someone else makes the choice for us. Missionary? HE broke up with ME. (Unthinkable, I know) In that case, reality slapped me hard across the face and gave me no choice but to take it. It was not easy, or painless.

The cookie party? Stupidly, all I got immediately was a twinge of guilt.

It was quickly buried under a mountain of justification. "If she had only planned further ahead she could have avoided this." "It's not my fault her cookie press broke." "It's not fair that everyone else made 4 dozen cookies and has to share them with her, who brought none." "I clearly stated the rules before the party." I even had to somehow bury the fact that there were probably more than 6 dozen cookies leftover and that everyone felt they had more than they would ever use. I managed to not even pack some up and take them to her with an apology. No, I just brushed it under the rug. I sought approval of my atrocious behavior from trusted friend. She gently tried to tell me I probably should have told her to come anyway, but I even managed to eliminate that guilt by telling myself that trusted friend didn't hold the same "standards of excellence" I was seeking for the evening.

I am afraid to report that the incident didn't strike me with it's proper horror until a much later time, when I felt snubbed from a group for not being able to contribute "properly". ("She brings a bag of chips to a potluck where everyone else brought something that took all morning to make? Let's not tell her about our next one...")

So how do we wake ourselves up to the blindness we live in TODAY? How do we avoid creating such misery for ourselves, and people we claim to care about?

I keep coming back to the idea that at the moment I find myself justifying ANY behavior, I am putting the blinders on. If my action was in course with what I knew to be right, or good, or true, I would not need to justify it for any reason. I never have to justify being kind. I never feel I have to justify being generous, or loving, or charitable. In fact, I am rewarded by feeling good. I don't have time to bother coming up with reasons why what I was doing instead WAS good.

What do you think? How have you been woken up to your "blind times"? Is there something blinding you now? Do you know what it is? How do you get out of it?

*In the Mormon Church women are assigned to each other (2 to 1) to look after and care for each other. As a "Visiting teacher" you are to visit or contact the person you visit teach at least once a month to see if she has any needs you can help with, and be a friend in general.

Only for Women who have been Pregnant....

2009-10-21T05:13:00.000-07:00

I have this recurring symptom of pregnancy that I can't recall ever having anyone else claim to be able to relate to. Having begun its onset MUCH earlier than usual, I thought I would take an informal survey of my friends to see if anyone else has had this that I just haven't run into yet.

(This just doesn't sound like it's going anywhere good, does it?)

I call it "the wishbone effect". That is, I feel like my legs are the two sides of a wishbone, and my pelvis where they meet. The uncomfortable part is, I feel like someone is trying to break the wishbone. This usually happens while walking around (naturally). I have heard some people say towards the later months they feel like their joints are "wobbly" or "loose", but this is actually painful. Like, my face involuntarily grimaces kind of pain. I've had this before, but never this early.

Anyone?

Seriously?

2009-10-05T18:49:00.001-07:00

My doorbell just rang while I was fixing dinner.

6th grade neighbor, whom recently pitched me Happenings books, pizzas, cookie dough, and chocolates wanted to know if I wanted to buy raffle tickets for the homecoming football game.

I said, "No, thank you.'

Aren't there child labor laws?

2009-09-30T16:40:00.000-07:00

Warning: This post contains a gripe

Today is September 30. The first day of school here was September 8. By my calculation, that means school has been in session for 22 days.

I have had children in my neighborhood ring my doorbell for THREE different fundraisers for the SAME SCHOOL. The first knock came, I kid you not, within 30 minutes of the bus dropping them off the FIRST DAY. That means that on the first day of school, they found time for an assembly to make salespeople out of them. Priorities I suppose. (That does not count the overlap from the 8 children in the neighborhood, all selling 3 different things, for a total of 24 solicitations in 22 days)

Not only do I NOT need, or want, overpriced Happenings Books (that contain coupons for places at least 2 counties away), disgusting cookie dough (I know, I've tried it the last 2 years), or frozen (cardboard) pizzas.

On top of all this, 2 years ago a bond was passed that increased our property taxes to help fund the schools. The irony of course is, that my children do not even ATTEND these schools. (Never mind that the district still gets the $14,000 in funds for the transportation they do not provide us ...) I remember the first year we were here our children did attend this school. I also remember one of them in TEARS because I wouldn't let them go door to door to sell, and hence, they could not win the limo ride to McDonalds for being the top salesperson.

My children (thankfully) attend charter schools that manage to produce outstanding test results with a fraction of the funds that the other local schools provide. Better yet, they have never pimped my children to PAY for any of it. Are there fundraisers? Yes. But guess what? I get clothing they can wear to school for the money! I have bid on items I actually WANTED at auctions in order to raise money for the PLAYGROUND our state funds will not afford us!

If my memory serves me, before Christmas I will also receive solicitations for "Butter Braids" ($12.00 a pop) and wrapping paper. I'm going to JUST SAY NO!!!

I am so glad I am able to send my children to a school where the education is the priority. I think all anyone else is doing is training a door to door sales force. Heaven knows with the education they get at school, that's all they'll be able to do.

My Next Life will be a Musical

2009-09-12T08:11:00.000-07:00

I am the youngest of five children. My parents had a 17 year age difference, which means my father was a teenager of the Great Depression (not kidding), and my mother was a teenager in the 50's. One of the results of this, was they both loved to watch old Musicals, and I, not having much choice in the matter, watched lots of them with them.

We lived in a small town and I was convinced that outside of our small town, it was perfectly normal for people to burst into song and dance spontaneously. How delightful! I couldn't wait until I could move someplace where this was daily life. But when I hit second grade, I decided I could wait no longer. I, seven year old Tiffany Crabtree, decided it was time to bring the joy of Musicals to life at Paradise Elementary School.

It was a rainy day, which meant we had indoor recess in Mrs. Dimas' second grade classroom. I remember a popular toy was a set of paper dolls. Naturally, a squabble broke out between a couple of girls over who got the dolls, and I decided what we needed was a song. Preferably one that would end with all of us dancing on top of our desks.

So, the heroine that I was, stood on top of my desk and with all the earnestness of my heart started singing (to some made up melody) "Don't fight..." I was a bit stunned to find that no more words came out of my mouth. There was no music starting. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to sing next. Nobody else was joining me. Instead they all just stared. I got down from the desk, my first pangs of harsh reality creeping into my little heart. Was my life never going to be a musical? What a dread and dreary thought.

To compensate I majored in Music Dance Theater in college. It helped ease the pain. When the movie "Enchanted" came out, I knew I was not alone in my hope of a better world. (In fact, I will turn on the Central Park scene in that movie whenever I am feeling blue. Whistling a happy tune just doesn't work if you can't whistle)

But last night, I definitively decided that whether my non-singing, non-dancing husband likes it or not, I am living my next life in a Musical. With the kids. So there.

We took all of them ('cept Susie of course) to Mary Poppins. Delightful. Inspiring. Magical. And my kids thought so too. The only thing better than loving something so much, is to see your kids love it too.

If you get a chance to catch the tour in your town, DONT' MISS IT! It's super-cali-blah, blah, -yeah, you know.

PS I am in no way ashamed or embarrased by that story. It just confirms that I'm onto something...

More pics

2009-09-02T17:35:00.000-07:00

State Fair Fun

2009-09-02T17:19:00.001-07:00

For the Grandfolks in Portland, here are some recent pics!

A Clarification

2009-08-31T13:54:00.000-07:00

For some odd reason, it has now come up 3 times this week that some folks still are not quite clear on the name of our fifth child. (That would be the feminine child born last May)
To help with clearing things up, please refer to this post

If my husband couldn't be a dentist, this is the least he could do...

2009-08-31T11:12:00.001-07:00

Yeah. That's right. I just got back from taking the kids to the dentist. I think we will have to cancel Christmas and next summer's vacation.
Unless my husband can talk Edy's into fluoride ice cream on a toothbrush popsicle stick...

(I apologize the photo is so small, but the resolution prohibited making it any larger...)

A Bun

2009-08-23T16:31:00.000-07:00

...in the oven.

Yes folks, I'm pregnant.

13 weeks along, due February 24th.

The Feng Shui Way

2009-07-16T14:39:00.001-07:00

I just finished a delightful little book I picked up on Feng Shui. By "delightful little book", I mean the size of the book, it's design color, it's font, etc. All of these elements, quite delightful, and I dare say, very feng shui.

But you've got to be kidding me. What I basically learned was: if your house is immaculate, clutter free, and on a noise-free street, you will be at peace.

Are they kidding?

I suppose the reason my house will truly never be feng shui is because I refuse to ring a bell everytime I enter a room.

Yeah, that's it.

A Joyful Noise

2009-07-10T08:48:00.000-07:00

On Monday this week we had company arrive from Chicago. Jack and Spencer's friends Jovan and Nikola (brothers of corresponding ages to J and S) arrived for 3 days. Jared left town the day they arrived. What was I thinking?

Don't get me wrong, the boys had oodles of fun.

Do you know HOW MUCH noise accompanies"oodles of fun"?

I'm taking the rest of the week off...

OH MY HECK! HAVE YOU HEARD???!!!

2009-07-07T07:15:00.000-07:00

Michael Jackson is STILL DEAD?!!! Gotta run...I have to watch the media say this for at least 3 more days....Too busy to write.

Ps. I'm too distraught to add a picture...

There's No Place Like Home!

2009-06-26T21:03:00.001-07:00

Today was the last day of my Orton-Gillingham class. It was fantastic, inspiring, and very, very hard. I am so much smarter than I was 2 weeks ago. In more ways than one.

I remember when I was young my mother used to always say, "I'm so glad I can be a stay at home mom, there's nothing in the world I would rather do." Of course, in my mind, that translated to, "There is no way I'm smart enough to ever do anything but cook and clean." I regret to admit I always felt a little disappointed that she never aspired to more. (I was a child of the feminist generation after all) But now I know for myself, I feel the same way.

As great as this class was, and as happy as I am that there are dedicated and professional people who go into the world and do this important thing for others, I am SOOOO happy to come back home and give it to my son. I miss being home. I miss having order that is in my charge. I miss my kids.

I am so glad I can be a stay at home mom. There's nothing in the world I would rather do.

Thanks mom. I finally get it.

An American Institution

2009-06-20T09:16:00.000-07:00

**Note** This post is being written in a effort to avoid working on the talk I'm supposed to give in sacrament meeting tomorrow, as well as the sunday school lesson I haven't even looked at. And, am I supposed to buy my husband something too? Do I need to make him breakfast in bed? I better go to the store...

This week our "neighborhood" is having a Garage Sale. A very ambitious neighbor looking for some extra cash organized the whole sha-bang. I have, on principle, sworn off ever participating in one. I don't mind buying something from a garage sale. But I really, really despise the idea of putting one on.

I remember when I was about 10 my mother spent no less than TWO MONTHS "organizing" hers. She didn't sleep the entire night before because she was up pricing. Our entire family life was on hold for the precious $200 she would garner for her efforts. Then, when the hoopla was done, she got to spend another day hauling it 45 minutes away to the Salvation Army. Capitalism at its finest.

So when my perky neighbor invited me to participate, my first response was NO WAY. Then the (very weak) frugal voice in the back of my head said, "You do have a basement full of stuff you don't need. Why not earn a little cash? It could be Christmas money!" etc., etc., etc. Then the reality that I would not be home the entire week prior to prepare sank in, so with a twinge of self inflicted guilt, I opted out.

I. am. so. glad.

For 3 days now, I have watched my neighbors sit on lawn chairs in their driveways from 8 AM to 4 PM. It has been hot and humid, but that's my observation as I get in and out of my air conditioned car. From speaking with them, they have each averaged about $100. Now, $100 is $100. But this is where the principal of "opportunity cost" applies.

I personally cannot see CHARGING my neighbors children to buy JUNK that I will then have to throw out. And maybe I've been a Mormon for too long, but it seems to me, if I've got a bin full of perfectly nice baby clothes I'll never use again, I'd just as soon GIVE them to neighbor with a new baby, rather than ask her to BUY them from me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not too proud to buy garage sale clothes. I have, and do. I'm also not opposed to making money. But I really believe in the whole "Karma" thing when it comes to giving things away.

I'd much rather just pack up my excess and send it out the door with a prayer that it will be a blessing to whomever is able to buy it. Just think of all the handicapped veterans that will be employed sorting and tagging it for me! Just think of the thrill of the thrift shop patron at the bargain! Have I lost out on $100, possibly, much more? Yes.

But I have spent the last 3 days doing much more satisfying things.

I just love the American way.

Pardon me if my brain explodes.

2009-06-19T13:36:00.000-07:00

Whew! What a week! I have spent the last 5 days, and will spend 5 more next week, taking a college class to obtain level 1 Orton-Gillingham certification. ("ya broke 'ur what?!") I know. What it really means, is that I will finally have official credentials to be Spencer's tutor, and whomever else I happen to tutor. (O-G, as it is called, is a "Multi-sensory, systematic, explicit approach to remediating reading difficulties")

It has been fun, tiring, and a great opportunity to flex my mental muscles. I'm glad I've already been studying this for a year and half. I've come home with a big headache each day, 3 hours of homework, and dreams about the complexities of short vowel articulation.
I'm ready for the weekend!

(Jared of course, is just happy I'm home to catch up on the laundry. But he seriously has been very supportive.)

Ever feel like your brain is going to explode?

Happy Birthday Susannah!!

2009-05-28T07:58:00.000-07:00

Date Night...interuppted

2009-05-16T14:45:00.000-07:00

Friday night.
Jack and Spencer at friends.
Most favorite sitter hired.
Star Trek tickets in hand.
Phone call.
Ethan and Olivia decide to test 911.
It works.
Sitter in tears.
Date night over.

There's no such thing as a free lunch

2009-05-09T13:18:00.000-07:00

I was just reading this and thinking.
If KFC can't provide enough chicken dinners for each person in the country to eat one meal, how can the government provide lifelong healthcare for free? Doesn't it seem logical that it too, would have to be rationed?

Seeing Red. (Or Pink?)

2009-04-17T17:19:00.000-07:00

I believe I have officially encountered my first genuine Mother/Daughter impasse.

Olivia wants her room pink. Not just one wall either. ALL of them. She has (solid) pink curtains, bedspread, and chair. Even with white walls there is already healthy does of pink in there.

Now, I will never be accused of being a decorator. Heaven knows my house could use some professional help. (I've still got a large stack of framed pictures, waiting to be hung, leaning against my bedroom wall. We moved in 18 mos. ago) This being said, it is the deepest, secret yearning of my heart to have my house (or at least one room in it) be just truly, deeply, beautiful. I would also settle for one that looks finished.

I am probably closer to getting the girls room to have a shot goal at that than any other in the house. But we are at a cross roads.

I am normally a very, "whatever" type of mom when it comes to this sort of thing. If my ego was truly tied up in my decor, I would have some. But I have seen too many hideously pink bedrooms to hand this one over. I can't stand walking into a bottle of pepto-bismol. I may not know much about decorating, but I do know, more is NOT better when it comes to pink. The budget doesn't allow for a change of bedding, curtains, and chair to offset the rest.

So, I am looking for advice. Tips on why I should change my mind and go with it, how to "do" all pink (the decorator way), or a lecture on how not giving in on this one will permanently damage my child. Even a pep talk telling me to forget her wants and just go with mine, she'll get over it. (hint- that's the one I'll like the best)

I really am thinking I should have just done it all for her. BEFORE she got an opinion.

Living the Dream

2009-04-16T08:41:00.000-07:00

For anyone who has ever questioned whether there really are glorious gifts within us all, check this out! Made my day. Reawakened sensitivity to how I judge others. (Let's hope it sticks)

Happy Easter!

2009-04-12T16:22:00.001-07:00

I have eaten way. too. much. It's been awesome. Hope your day was as happy as ours!

A Worthy Young Padowan

2009-04-09T20:58:00.001-07:00

As most of you are aware, we recently took a trip to California. It was delightful. As I don't have time to document our entire trip tonight, I thought I would (finally) tease with one of the highlights of our trip.
Disneyland now has a "Jedi Training Academy", and Ethan wanted in BIG TIME. After failure to be chosen the first day, and 2 hours of tears and pouting after that, we went back the second day resolved to be "the chosen one". There were 6 shows that day, and thankfully we only had to sit through 1 to get picked. (I think the sign definitely helped)
As you can see, Ethan survived his encounter with Darth Maul, who was for sure "more harder than Vadar" to beat. Good thing we had all that light saber practice at home...
Don't you just love 6 year old boys?

Book Club

2009-03-11T20:00:00.000-07:00

I should be doing a sink full of dishes, and cleaning up the tornado that swept through my children's prison, I mean bedrooms, upstairs during book club.
Instead, I am blogging.
Just had to say we had a delightful book club tonight. (Our neighborhood ladies) The book was "A long way from Chicago" and the sequel, "A year down yonder" by Richard Peck. Very, very delightful read. Lighted hearted, funny and poignant.
The book inspired the evening's treats (hence the dishes).
Fresh, hot, fluffy biscuits and jam, prohibition era sasparilla, chicago hot dogs (okay, lil' smokies) and homeade apple pie. Of course we had some veggies "from Grandma Dowdels garden" to keep our figures in check... We even "churned" our own butter in a mason jar to spread on the biscuits.
See, book club without wine CAN be fun!

No, I'm not dead.

2009-03-07T19:41:00.000-08:00

Just boring. Every night as I lay in bed I think of these very clever posts I am going to type up and write, and then the next morning comes and my wit (assuming it was actually witty...) has left me completely. In fact, my mind is nothing but a blank canvas that is quickly splattered with that days to do list, and then weeks go by with nothing posted.
But the good news is, we did get an awesome new camera! So soon, (ahem) I can post some super cute pictures, sowing the seeds of resentment from my oldest 4 children about "How come you didn't take cute pictures of me, like these four hundred you took of Susannah?"
Just doing my part to keep counselors employed in our future economy.

Very, Very, Good News

2009-02-20T06:12:00.001-08:00

I am thrilled to report that Lucas is living in Idaho with Doug and Shauna. He had his first day of school yesterday, and was very excited and happy about his new situation. There was a rather miraculous change of heart, and sooner and easier than we could have hoped for, he was on his way to Idaho.

Thank you, thank you, for your prayers. He will continue to need them, along with everyone else, as they all adjust to this new life.

LOL

2009-02-12T09:10:00.001-08:00

I've been waiting to post until I had something upbeat to write about. I've been feeling a little down.

The week started off with more sleepless nights worrying about Lucas, followed by Jared going out of town, followed by me getting the flu.

Then, just to make me laugh, I fell down the stairs this AM and broke the big toe on my left foot!

I mean, really, isn't that funny? Maybe it's just the vicadin...

In case you are wondering, they can't do anything for a broken toe except tell you to wear flat, hard soled shoes and wait 6 weeks. And as my twenty-something PA told me, "As 'we' get older, it can take longer for bones to heal". At least she didn't use the phrase "advanced maternal age".

Well, I'm going to laugh myself to sleep for a nap now. At least Jared's coming home tonight instead of tomorrow! And I get new shoes! I think I'll have him rent me a wheelchair at the Mall of America tomorrow and we'll go shoe shopping! What fun! (What a girl won't do for new shoes....)

Humiliation

2009-01-21T07:57:00.000-08:00

My new job at church is to teach the 16/17 year old Sunday School class. I have been at it for 3 weeks now, and they are all really stellar kids. I, however, feel the need to "build relationships of trust" with them. Maybe if we know each other a little better, there will be more discussion in class.

What luck! An invitation comes to help the seminary kids (including my class) prepare for the scripture mastery challenge by competing with them in a practice round on Friday Jan. 30. (For those who may not know, seminary as Mormons know it, is what all 9-12 grade students attend, usually BEFORE school every school day to study the scriptures- one book of scripture for each of the 4 years) Optimistically, I accept.

I somehow was under the delusion that they were studying Doctrine and Covenants this year, which I teach in Sunday School. I was of course, a whiz at D & C scriptures. (And I do mean, a GENIUS) What an opportunity to impress these youngsters! They will have new respect for me indeed! What a jolly good time we will have. (The name of my championship team the year I won BTW, was "The Burning Bosoms")

For those of you in the know of course, you know, that this year they are in New Testament. Naturally, these are the scripture mastery scriptures I know the LEAST. There are TWENTY FIVE of them. I have 9 days to prepare. Yeah, right. I began to doubt that I would come off so smart to them after all.

So, after hosting a baby shower last night, I woke this morning with renewed determination to study. Hmmm, I bet if I could download them onto my ipod, I could do laundry and listen to them all day! Great idea! I'll listen to them in the car, how great it will be for my children to hear them all day too! This will turn out splendidly.

I gather together my new, never asked for fancy-dancy ipod, and find a plug that fits. I google something obvious. A-ha! I am set. I hit "download". (can you tell I've never done this before?)

45 minutes later, I still cannot figure out how the ******* to get the dang stuff on to my stupid ipod. (Naturally, Jared is in very important meetings all day...so I can't even have him walk me through it) I have now wasted almost an hour doing that, and another 30 minutes blogging about my frustration. Looks like it's going to be another highly productive day.

Did I really sign up for this humiliation!? I am feeling REALLY old, and out of touch! It's a miracle I can blog at all...

P.S. Please no smart aleck comments about how "super easy" it is to download ipod songs,okayeee?

When does the "warm" in Global Warming start? Anything I can do to help?

2009-01-13T06:30:00.000-08:00

As I speak, it is -22 F. That means 22 degrees below ZERO. That is NOT the windchill.

Of course, school is still in session. Which is why I had a "Christmas Story" scenario bundling up 4 of my kids after sending Jack on his way with Jared. We hopped in the car, went to pick up the first carpool stop, to learn that our school, not any others near us, has a two hour delay start. (As if THAT's going to help!)

So, we get to get in the car and do it all again in an hour and half. I say, we just stay home and bake cookies.

But, it'll have to be a REALLY cold day (in hell) before school is actually canceled so we could do that.

I love Minnesota, I love Minnesota, I love Minnesota....

Effective Time Management

2009-01-05T12:19:00.000-08:00

In the spirit of New Year's Resolutions, I got online to Franklin Covey today to order my new planner pages. Boy, am I going to be efficient. A quick, 10 minute, time-saving, online purchase to be delivered right to my doorstep. The height of efficiency and convenience. Ah, yes. I am starting the New Year off on the right foot.
After 2 hours, and 2 phone calls to exotic "customer service" people all the way in India, I finally found a gen-u-ine, American talking person. Found out that after 2 hours on the phone out of the country, my order wasn't placed correctly after all, so I got to repeat all the info again. (I now have the items numbers memorized if you were curious)
I also now know, that if I want to effectively manage my time while shopping for time management supplies, I'm better off to hop in my car, drive 40 minutes to Mall of America, and pick up my own stuff!

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T12:37:00.000-08:00

So how was your New Year's Eve? We have had a tradition not quite making it until midnight around here, but the kiddos are now old enough that that just won't fly anymore. So, we had some friends over and while the grown ups played my favorite card game (Shang Hai), the kiddos ran around and did whatever they wanted until midnight. Then we banged on pots and pans to let our neighbors know we are even weirder than they think, and threw confetti all over my front porch. (It was about 2 below zero) We all got to bed around 2 AM, and we are starting off the New Year with a sugar, Diet Pepsi, and sleep deprived hangover. But it was fun!
So, please share, what did you do?
Happy 2009!

Merry Christmas

2008-12-26T11:28:00.000-08:00

Waiting anxiously at the top of the stairs!
Susannta Claus on Christmas Eve
Look at all the loot! (who knew we were that good!)
Leaving cookies for a famished Santa...
Daddy made some indoor golf for the boys!
Olivia giving Fancy Nancy a run for her money...
Susie's first Christmas! (She likes the bows best)

The Weather Outside is Frightful

2008-12-20T09:49:00.000-08:00

Today is the first day in a long while that we have NO PLANS! (By design) I was in bed until 9:30. (With a few children rotating in and out) It is supposed to snow 7 inches. We finished Christmas shopping last night. We're going to go get a couple of groceries and a movie. This is the best day ever.

UPDATE! At approximately 10:00PM Saturday night we got a phone call that all church meetings were canceled for Sunday! We're Mormon. We're Minnesotan. That pretty much means this is nothing less than a Christmas Miracle.

Yippee! Guilt free church skipping!

Laundry Quandry

2008-12-20T09:33:00.000-08:00

Today as I was folding a couple of loads of laundry, it occured to me that most of what I was folding was school uniforms for Jack, Spencer, and Ethan.
It next occured to me, that they have two whole weeks without school. How nice it will be to not have to wash uniforms so often!
It then occured to me that they only have 2 days worth of non-school or church clothes.
Crap.

Ever laugh so hard milk comes out your nose?

2008-12-10T19:04:00.000-08:00

Fourth of Fourth

2008-11-25T19:11:00.000-08:00

Per Carole's reccomendation, I went to the 4th picture file on my computer, and pulled out the 4th picture in the file. It was the boys' "TP"ing Jared's office (with paper towels) on April Fool's Day this year. Enjoy!

24 hrs. in my life

2008-11-22T14:09:00.000-08:00

At the suggestion of Jennie, I documented a fairly typical day in my life. This particular day was Nov.20, 2008. I assure you, it wasn't as boring as it may look. The night before began with only 1 child in our room, the morning begins with 3.Jared spends a few minutes getting a head start on work...
While Jack eats his breakfast.
It's only 6:41 AM,
but it's time for Jared to take Jack to school. (25 Min. drive)
By then beautiful Susannah is awake with her morning smiles!
Time for Mommy to get beutiful for the day! (I swear I took a dozen pictures before I got one I didn't look like a moron in)
Time for Ethan and Spencer to have breakfast and get ready for school!

My day for carpool!
Spencer takes a picture of himsel!
Arriving at school.
These are the kits that have taken me 3 months to put together. I help teach small groups in 1st grade 2-4 days a week phonemic awareness.
Next I go get the girls from my friend Amy's house! (Thanks for sitting Amy!)

Then, we dash off to dance for Olivia!
Susie gets a bottle in the car while we wait for Olivia at dance.
Then it's home to get some chores done. Like the basement. Ughhhh! (babysteps, babysteps, babysteps...)
Now why would a girl be this happy?
Because it's time to go to Target!!! (I had intended to do a whole post on our NEW Target. It's only been open a month, and I've already spent a year's worth of money there. Hooray for no more 25 minute trips to Target!)
The beautiful, Waconia Target.
Olivia is so happy with her snack!
The view from the top of the hill coming to our house. (We're the yellow one in the middle)
Time to change the baby's stinky diaper! (I spared you that picture)
Time for naps!
My gourmet lunch, eaten while on the computer, and checking my to do list for the rest of the day.
Time to wrap the present bought at Target for Ethan's party after school! (I only did that because he was going straight there. I'm normally a very strict "do it yourself" type of mom)
Back in the Mormon mobile.
Back to the school
Carpool!
Picking up the Dibs freeezers from the fundraiser the night before!
After school snack. Very healthy, of course.
I suppose I better do last night's dinner, and this mornings' breakfast dishes before I start dinner.
But in the meantime, Spencer gets to make cupcakes for a cub scout requirement. He gets to bring the pack meeting treat!
What a cook!
Finally sitting down for dinner!
Then everyone dashes off to pack meeting! (Susie and I stay home)
Unfortunately, a tray of cupcakes doesn't survive the mad dash out the door. Good thing we have a freezer full of ice cream.
Unfortunately, the dishes didn't disappear as fast as my helpers.
This is how I looked by the time the dishes were done.
Fold a "quick" load of laundry...
Put the girls in bed...

And fall asleep before the boys get back home!
I can't believe I get to get up and do this all again tomorrow!

techinical difficulties

2008-11-22T10:21:00.000-08:00

For those who may, or may not, be anxiously awaiting the pics in "A day in my life", it has been postponed due to techinical difficulties. The dang website won't let me upload any pics. I'll keep trying.

Ladies Man

2008-11-19T09:34:00.000-08:00

As it is a constant challenge to wake Ethan up for school everyday, I am always trying to come up with a motivating version of "Time to get up." Today's version came via email.
A girl named Maddie in Ethan's class is inviting Ethan to her birthday party at "Pizza Ranch" on Monday. Now, not only is this a birthday party, but a girls birthday party, at the very gender neutral, but testosterone leaning, Pizza Ranch. I wasn't sure what his response would be, but I was sure it would stir him from his slumber in an expedited manner.
I was correct.
"Ethan" I said. "Time to get up. I got an email from Maddie's mom today, and she invited you to go to her birthday party at Pizza Ranch."
Ethan promptly, if sleepily, sits up. Without hesitation he replied,
"Well, of course she did. She's in love with me."
Ladies Man has RSVP'd.

Enough Already!

2008-11-15T17:44:00.003-08:00

I think I will make my blog private and not invite my husband. He is offended that I said he insults people, and even more offended that there were no comments to repudiate that fact. Adding insult to injury, instead my lovely friends merely requested free coupons.

As a clarification, I do not think Jared is an offensive person. My point was he is charming, and witty, and very honest and likable.

I am confident my friends agree. So, for the sake of my marriage, please, even you lurkers out there, leave a comment/compliment for my husband.

Then I'll thinking about locking him out. (of my blog that is)